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Newsletter No. 20: FINAL SCORE: GOD=EVERYTHING, YOU=NOTHING
"His parched lips were half-open in an imbecilic smile, his eyes were hazy and had a confused look of criminal desire, mute supplication, and repulsive sorrow." - Witkiewicz, The 622 Downfalls of Bungo Drink me us you bastards. Open wide and suck us down. We're the toast of this motherfucking town and we're back again. Go ahead, struggle with our love, our love, our love, struggle with it. Hug it. Touch it. Shit. Can you tell? That even as handsome as we are that we're hungering for the fucking grave? How does one go about doing this shit without secretly seeking the quiet and stillness of no life? I mean, well what I mean is that it's like jumping out of a moving car with everything going from great, great, great to a rush and a tumble and then, if you're lucky, companionable silence and great discomfort. I mean how do you stand on line at the DMV amidst all of the great unwashed, locked into their stultifying horrors, and not want to die? See this is a function of contrasts: a short tour, like a dream during a catnap, is easily forgotten. But a long tour, oh a long tour (long here translated as "long enough to get used to cheese as a breakfast food") though can fuck shit up regardless of whether it is, and this mportant, GOOD O A BAD tour calls into question the colossal egoism that drives so called artists out on the road to begin with. Perhaps, like the performance artist standing on stage slapping steaks against their face, we secretly guess that we ARE wasting our lives. Perhaps we've lost sight of the meaning and import of the word SHAME. Perhaps. But like the man says nothing exceeds like that which succeeds. So it goes that GOOD tours are even worse. Because they make almost all the rest of it impossible. Your boss, in regaling you with tales about his youthful swordsmanship (translation: cocksmanship), will not understand that YOU the International Fucking Rock Star could really not give a significant fuck. Your lovers do not give a shit. The old people in line in front of you at the supermarket don't care. And that's just it. No one cares and because no one cares it doesn't matter and because it doesn't matter it might as well not have happened. Right? Hahhahahahaha. Wrong! We ARE International Fucking Rock Stars (in the pantheon of artistic significance that's about as significant as International Fucking PORN Star, which is to say REALLY fucking significant) and fuck you all with a corncob. The tour was great. The tour diary is yours to read (though the breakdown is this: shorter newsletter with actual news THEN the actual tour diary). So read it and weep along with us at the dirty fucking trick that that bitch life has played on us now that we have to spend our time with you dusty fucking rabble again instead of, instead of, well instead of eating oysters in Zurich, sleeping on dirty floors in France, or punching drunken Italians in the face. We bemoan the passing of the lifestyle to which we've become accustomed! Goddamn it! Goddamn it all! |