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Newsletter No. 22: IS "KARL DEMATA" A MOTHERFUCKER? "Well what do you do when someone's gotten you in one of those chokeholds?" "That's like asking 'what do you do after you've been knocked out?' The answer is, as always: not a goddamned thing." - Matt Furey If unusually frank/strong language makes you uncomfortable then jump off here because this newsletter will be a departure from the usual bandinage, the gay repartee and generalized bonhomie that is the OXBOW newsletter in abstract. In actual fact this newsletter will attempt to answer, in true Socratic form, whether or not a man who for the sake of protecting the innocent will be called "Karl Demata," is indeed a motherfucking cocksucker as we alleged here... http://www.theoxbow.com/oxbow_content/d02_01.htm Now now now. We know what you're thinking. Those boys done fell into a vat of that yellow sunshine acid that they pass out with driver's licenses and breath mints on Monday, Wednesday and Fridays in California. But dig this: "We write with regard to the Tour Diary" page posted by the Neurot band Oxbow on their official website http://www.theoxbow.com/oxbow_content/d02_01.htm and the highly defamatory comments written there pertaining to Karl Demata and, by association, this company contained within. At no time did Karl Demata or this company accept responsibility for the processing and acquisition of legal paperwork that would allow Oxbow to tour in the United Kingdom, this has frankly NOTHING to do with ourselves. When asked by the bands European promoter he passed the number of the British console, if anything Mr Demata was being helpful. We are a distributor and have never done this for any band that is on our distributed roster before. WE THEREFORE INSIST THAT ALL DEROGATORY AND LIBELOUS COMMENTS RELATING TO BOTH THIS COMPANY, PLASTIC HEAD MUSIC DISTRIBUTION LIMITED, AND KARL DEMATA ARE REMOVED FROM THE WEBSITE WITHIN 24 HOURS OF RECEIPT OF THIS CORRESPONDENCE. FURTHERMORE WE INSIST THAT A FULL APOLOGY TO KARL DEMATA AND THIS COMPANY IS POSTED ON THE SAME PAGE AT THE SAME TIME. FAILURE TO DO SO WILL RESULT IN IMMEDIATE LEGAL ACTION. Yours sincerely, Steve Beatty Director steve@plastichead.com" November 17, 2003 So that begs the question: is an indie distributor that makes 4 million pounds a year fighting the so-called good fight against corporate capitalism crossing the line into the worst excesses of corporate capitalism when they threaten a band that makes $20,000 a year with litigation? I don't know but consider this: 1) STEVEN SPIELBERG MAKES SHITTY MOVIES. 2) TOM CRUISE IS GAY. 3) BARRY DILLER IS AN IRREDEEMABLE ASSHOLE. And now consider that NONE of these mega-moguls has, will, or even considered SUING OXBOW!!!

AND SOCRATES SAYS TO GLAUCON A farce in ONE ACT. SOCRATES is played by OXBOW. His erstwhile student GLAUCON is played by a motherfucking cocksucker. SOCRATES: "Hello Mr. Demata, nice to finally make your acquaintance, albeit a cyber one. We appreciate you taking time out of your busy schedule to indulge us in this little clarification exercise. Below you will find responses to the various points in question." GLAUCON: "Hello Eugene from Oxbow, Even before dealing with the statements contained on the band's official Site" SOCRATES: "There is very little that is "official" about OXBOW, but why niggle? GLAUCON: "I would have to ask you to forward me any document in which I state that I would accept money for granting Oxbow access in the UK for their tour. In my recollection I have never given any commitment of this kind in words or writing." SOCRATES: "There is most certainly an email wherein Splatter Promotion offers to pay you some small honorarium for putting you through the trouble of faxing said form to the proper permitting authorities. The email does NOT however indicate that you would ACCEPT money for this. Which is consistent with what we've said. We just said we offered, NOT that you accepted." GLAUCON: "I am also curious about the e-mail in which I apologize for not promoting Oxbow. To the best of my recollection, the only e-mail I remember sending that had even a remote chance of being misconstrued in this way was the one I sent to Kristin [Neurot] stating that I had nothing to do with you." SOCRATES: "This is precisely the one of which we speak. Good of you to recall this. GLAUCON: "But let's start from the beginning and make few points clear: 1. I DO NOT work for Neurot. I work for a Plastic Head affiliated company. I am in charge of press, marketing and general media relationships on behalf of a handful of record labels. I charge these labels on a retainer basis. I am responsible for those labels' artists press in the UK, only those labels (!) and only press (!). Neurot is NOT one of those labels. I have never received any payment from Neurot - neither did Plastic Head - for press or marketing services." SOCRATES: "The quibble has never been over your ASSIGNED work task/job description. The actual work relationship/professional relationship as it exists between your company and the label that licenses OXBOW music is outside of our knowledge area. What is fully within the realm of what we understand to be true is what you yourself have promised and agreed to. Hence the issue of promissory estoppal. Whether or not you were SUPPOSED to do anything for OXBOW or not as outlined in your job description, has little bearing when lined up against what you said/implied you would do. If from the beginning you had said "I will do nothing." We could have made plans to cover ourselves and guarded against the potential lost revenue incurred as a result of NOT getting the press we were clearly capable of getting (witness: Sept. 2002). As it was, to quote Marlon Brando from On the Waterfront, "we trusted you." And this, it appears, was a mistake." GLAUCON: "2. Any dealings that I might have had with Neurot in the past were strictly on a courtesy level (i.e.: Plastic Head label manager would ask me if I could help out with some specific releases to present to the UK press)." SOCRATES: "Well then it seems your peevishness is attached to the fact that we weren't more thankful for whatever consideration you DID give us?" GLAUCON: "3. I am not an immigration lawyer. I know nothing about these procedures. None of the bands I have worked on have ever asked me to sign or provide any paper work on this level and, to any industry standards, this is NOT the Press Office's job." SOCRATES: "Statements that would have worked wonders up front/much earlier had they been spoken/written by you." GLAUCON: "4. I only got involved in the Oxbow UK tour because I was forwarded an e-mail from Jonathan Selzer. I took such e-mail as a request for help (and further conversation with Jonathan confirmed that indeed this was a distress call)." SOCRATES: "I've taken the liberty of notifying him, and a few other members of the press who were involved in the last minute scramble to aid us in securing the legal right to play your country as well, since we're fairly amazed that we're having this discussion at all." GLAUCON: "On to the present situation: I agree that this whole affair might and should have been settled with a phone call, but such a phone call should have come from you to either me or Neurot." SOCRATES: "Well this is semantics. You call us...we call you...water under the bridge. As a matter of a fact this is all water under the bridge. A bridge called May 2002. At this remove of 6 months who should have called whom seems a little silly to spend too much time on." GLAUCON: "If you would have made such phone call before posting malicious, childish statements on your web-site..." SOCRATES: "And it could have gone something like this: OXBOW: Karl, you motherfucking cocksucker...why didn't you do what you said you were going to do? why didn't you fucking fax a piece of paper for us so we could play your country and maybe sell some records and maybe get some press to help you sell some records? KARL DEMATA: Fuck you. It's not my job. I hate you. Don't ever call me again. OXBOW: Oh. Well fuck you anyway. KARL DEMATA: Well fuck you too. OXBOW: Uh, okay. Goodbye. KARL DEMATA: Good riddance. And at that point I would have published THAT instead. So perhaps that's the real issue....your perceived feelings of helplessness in light of information you hold to be untrue. We'd gladly print anything/any rebuttal you might like to offer on our website as well, it should be noted. That is, the OXBOW website is an open forum (witness: the uncomplimentary things on said website ABOUT OXBOW)." GLAUCON: "to ask about my amount of my involvement in the Oxbow tour, you would have found an amicable answer: zero. I was only trying to be as helpful as I could be in what seemed to be an emergency situation. Instead, you chose to publicly attack me..." SOCRATES: "if you consider the 15 or so people who read the OXBOW website to be the public." GLAUCON: "instead of addressing your grievances directly and, in so doing, placed a huge strain on Plastic Head's relationship with Neurot for no good reason." SOCRATES: "Well NEUROT has very little to do with this. But your craven attempt to drag them into the mud where we live just saddens me. about as much as it probably saddens you to be called a "motherfucking cocksucker." Or whatever it is that we called you." GLAUCON: "Does this help to enlighten you on why I might "niggardly" take "umbrage to being called a cocksucker"? SOCRATES: "To clarify, the "niggardly" modified what we believe your work style to be." GLAUCON: "Can you understand that I am not "contorted by concerns over my real value," but simply defending my position without, I might add, getting personal and vicious?" SOCRATES: "I DO see. And what points you should get for COUTH are completely offset by these totally dickish threats of legal action. So while we could clearly debate your "motherfucking cocksucker" status in regards to the May 2002 tour ad infinitum, this recent bandinage removes any doubt. So we'll allow you to upload any sort of statement you want, to give you a voice in this as well, including this one. But it is clearly, your call. GLAUCON: "Again, I ask of you to please remove the statements from your website without further delay. I ALSO REQUEST A FULL APOLOGY POSTED TO MYSELF AND PLASTIC HEAD MUSIC DISTRIBUTION LTD." SOCRATES: "See above. Any ADDITION would read very much like the above graphs. It is also my sense that PhD is spared any damning condemnation, and that this is largely about YOU. And US, of course." GLAUCON: "As soon as these demands are met, I will be very happy to wash my hands of both Oxbow and Neurot." SOCRATES: "Well it seems that you had done that a long time ago, but I'm editorializing. Much like I was in the Tour Diary. However your seeking to punish Neurot for what we, a band that's not even ON their label (we licensed them our music) is sad, very sad. While we may have been assholes to YOU (and NOT PhD), Kristin and by proxy Neurot has been nothing but sweet and accommodating to YOU (AND PhD) and your attempt to harm them professionally is once again confirmation that we weren't too far off of the mark to begin with."

EXPERTS AGREE: ASSHOLES WHO SUE FOR BEING CALLED ASSHOLES ARE ASSHOLES! "If you called me a fucking muthafucker, I'd take it as a pat on the back.... stupid cunt!, he should be honoured. Maybe if everyone you know sends him an email that backed up the motherfucker accusation, this would prove the fact that he was indeed a motherfucker and it would be laughed out of court (which it will be anyway......cunt!)" - Steve Gullick, Careless Talk Costs Lives "Yeah, but is he, y'know, a motherfucker? You'd think they'd answer that question. If there's any info I can give you all things label/distributor/motherfucker, please don't hesitate to ask." - Gerard Cosloy, MATADOR Records GC "I notice the emphatic use of the word 'nothing' in both sets of correspondence. Funny thing is, that's what I expect from the [so called 'alternative'] industry in this country. Anything else is a bonus. And it's probably what these fucks'll come with. Why not just settle out of court with some good, dependable violence?" - Damian Bennett, Time Out London Damian Bennett Time Out Systems Dept/ext 6183 "This of course is like a big bold confirmation of him being more than a motherfucker..." ‹ Splatter Promotions, Berlin "Yeah, you should NOT change a single word. it's a free country and there's freedom of speech here plus there's tons of assaulting and illegal stuff on the internet, so i wonder why they even give a fuck. i mean, is it that difficult to see the difference between just an insult and ending up with the bullet in the head and sharp item up the ass? he's definitely asking for that too, it seems..." ‹ Robert Iwanik, Southern Records keep me posted... "its kindafunny the work permit thing, as i just got them in 3 days this week for the Gaza Strippers, it took me 15 minutes to fill the forms in....oh well." - Simon, Cargo Records UK AND THIS JUST IN... SOCRATES: "Steve Beatty, well after hearing from both Kristin and Steve it seems that we, that is, you and I, are back to negotiating over how best to resolve this thing...the thing being whether or not the world needs to be told about Karl Demata's motherfucking cocksucking work style. Which makes damned good sense to me. Or at least more sense than veiled threats of "action." In any case feel free to dispute anything written here but your position as characterized by me is as it was communicated to me by Steve (and Kristin). To whit: that you are willing to forgo the apology if we just delete the reference to Karl and PhD. Is this correct? If so, please let us know." STEVE BEATTY: "thats correct." SOCRATES: "Perfect. Now could you put that in writing for us? Sorry to be such a stickler but your "That's correct" comment could refer to almost anything so please spell out the terms for us, we'll convene, and then let you know ASAP what we've decided, bringing the total time we've all spent on this whole issue to 196 work-hours...Hard to believe, however, that the indolent Mr. Demata is worth 196 of anything, but we suppose you have your reasons." STEVE BEATTY: "Take ALL comments about Karl Demata and PHD off your site and we will not take any action against you. This needs clarified today and action on your site immediate" SOCRATES: "see, this is the kind of bullshit autocratic command stuff that just begets disrespect for several reasons to be enumerated here 1) there are no comments presently existing on the site that refer to PhD 2) the "action against you" part is a threat, a bad negotiating tactic and ridiculous besides 3) your last sentence, the barely intelligible "This needs clarified today and action on your site immediate" and it's demand for IMMEDIATE is fucking ridiculous as our webmaster is in Hawaii on vacation and won't return until next week so there's going to be nothing immediate about any of this. Your first ORDER gave us 24 hours. Your subsequent ORDERS keep saying very much the same thing. Now if you're willing to work with OUR schedule than we will make editorial alterations to the page. However, if you cannot work with our schedule, go ahead and make good on your threats and do whatever the fuck you want. In any case this is the last email you'll get from us as it is A COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME and we don't have the time to waste. So respond YES and we will do what we said we will do WHEN our guy gets back or say NO and do what you say you're going to do. STEVE BEATTY: "Yes."

SO LET'S RECAP... 1) OXBOW is threatened with legal action because it called someone a cocksucker motherfucker. 2) That someone sucked some cocks long enough and hard enough to get someone to take that someone seriously enough to actually contact attorneys. 3) Those someones threaten the beautiful people at Neurot. 4) OXBOW deletes all references to that someone instead choosing to focus on that worthless bitch KARLA TOMATA and her fucking cocksucking motherfucking dereliction of duties. 5) Case closed. Beautiful. Thoughts, daily affirmations, or gentle reminders can be sent to info@plastichead.com PlasticHead Distribution distributes SST Records, Golf Records, Candlelight Records, Blackend Records, Victory Records, Revelation records, Equal Vision Records, Go-Kart Records and, it should be noted: Neurot... They also promise to do the best job possible distributing OXBOW records. They, to date, have sold 11.

WHY WE ARE SO HANDSOME: Look. Look deeply. And weep. Weep for Hecuba. OXBOW photos: 1) www.cabine-b.com (go to the "news"section, and go to the chronique26/09/02) 2) http://www.emmadesigns.com/oxbowpics.html 3) http://geocities.com/hollyhenrickson/oxbowindex.htm 4) http://www.geocities.com/hollyhenrickson/main.htm 5) http://www.jardinmoderne.org/portfolio/concerts/oxbow/index.htm OXBOW film: 1) http://www.3580.com/oxbow OXBOW audio: OXBOW acoustic session... When: last september over Paris and its suburbs. Where: helter skelter, aligre fm on 93.1 stereo. The monday after (9th) the program will be available on streaming real audio for 2 weeks only: www.helterskelterfm.com ("live" section).

THE MALE SAC OO LA LA SASSOON "Actually the other day i thought of them [OXBOW]...some silly little girl...(ya know those cute indie girls that are fucked up and confused like all girls) was walking around with a very trendy purse, stockings, and vintage shoes, and sporting her adored OXBOW teeshirt very proudly. almost too proudly. i had to slap her."--Marjan SAHARA FUCKING HOT NIGHTS, BABY! "I heard your show last night [at The Bottom of the Hill w/Sahara Hot Nights] was awesome. An SF friend had fun watching you guys scare the shit out of the Sahara Hot Nights crowd. He said he left after your set, as he didn't feel right about staying, even tho he went just to see sahara nights."--KVN THE HERVE VILLECHAIZE SOCIETY "They were rather good, yes. Sludge and biiiig space... This Eugene guy - how come he's eight foot six tall on stage and normal sized off?" - Marina Organ 100 Percent Man!!! "oxbow are amazing... a new lp, 'an evil heat' came out on neurosis's 'neurot' label this year, and they've toured the UK twice ...they played a show at the ICA last night before a crowd equally made up of enthralled and piqued punters, and fart-smelling wasters who seemed to have no shame in spending their spare time heckling eugene from a safe distance. their sound is more abstract now - more lumps of noise hanging in the air waiting to ignite than straight ahead riffs, though the blues sludge is till there, and BOY are these motherfuckers tightbutloose, the noise just putty in their hands. they play metal like its jazz - not overly played, but fractured and fluid. and eugene plays into the arena of performance art with his vocalisations and onstage personae, with more panache and effect than anyone ive ever seen. ‹ stevie http://www.ilxor.com/searchresults.php?board=2&q=oxbow&mode=messages

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY YELLING? MORE WORD ON THE LARGE SAC'D AND EIGHTH WONDER OF THE FUCKING MODERN WORLD: OXBOW'S AN EVIL HEAT Oxbow - An Evil Heat Neurot Records 2002 Porn music sucks. There's nothing more certain to cause a sudden case of impotence than having to watch some hairy guy with scabs on his ass bang some chick missionary style to what could be considered the equivalent of a juice harp. That's just not pretty nor is it sexy. But, it's porn. You don't go to Taco Bell looking for ambience or for healthy food and you don't watch porno to spend quality time with that special someone. An Evil Heat is my idea of what porn music should be. It's loud, abrasive and vulgar. Visions come to mind of some guy strapped to a chair butt-ass naked. In walks in a tall slinky dominatrix who proceeds to kick the shit out of him. That's the kind of porn I'm talking about and I can't think of a better band for the soundtrack than Oxbow. The band's latest album comes to us on Neurot Recordings so we have an idea what to expect. Minimalist sludgy guitars, scant drum fills and shouted, screamed, barked vocals similar to that of a cat being pulled apart. Sex, religion, love...you name it, all is blasphemed here. Early Godflesh and Scorn only come to mind due to the convolution of these 9 tracks coming in at over 75 minutes. If a large amount of pharmaceuticals weren't ingested in the making of this record you've got me fooled, because these guys are seriously fucked up. If you like previously mentioned bands or your porno on the harder side check Oxbow out. Let the beatings begin. - roy culver http://www.fineprintmag.com/showreviews.php?id=221 OXBOW SUCKS... MY COCK Oxbow - don't even go there! If I wanted to see a man stripping down to his pants, grabbing his own cock and hitting himself, I certainly wouldn't have come tonight. Cheap! Skippy http://www.skippyscage.com/reviews02/290902.html http://www.lambgoat.com/albums/view.asp?aid=397 During the past twelve years or so, San Francisco's Oxbow has performed around the world and released several albums, and this, their most recent effort, is totally atypical of the vast majority of records we review. Their strange blend of rock and weirdness is undoubtedly not hardcore, metal, or anything close. Frankly, this is a difficult album to review, because a song is not a song, but merely another twist to an entirely strange aural journey. The first track, "The Snake &...," is a telling indication of the oddities to come. Vocalist Eugene Robinson maniacally talks and rants over guitar feedback and a few occasional drum fills. Like a crazed preacher with a drunkenly venomous delivery, Robinson swings and swoons menacingly. And just when you start to question whether this record really contains any actual music, the band kicks in with some simplistic yet oddly affecting progressions, before abruptly stopping. The listener is then promptly greeted by a handful of meandering bass and organ notes on "...The Stick" (nominal counterpart to the opening track). Once again, the arrangement is accented by Robinson's random vocal noises and phrases. And as unannounced as before, the band kicks in briefly. They quickly disappear... more vocals... then return with some meaty noise-rock. This scenario plays out several more times before the group slams in with some Led Zeppelin styled grooves. Imagine Zeppelin at their most straight-forward with some crazed lunatic as a vocalist, rather than Robert Plant, and you get the idea. Nearly as unpredictable as their arrangements are their lyrics. Though I wasn't able to make much sense of them from a thematic perspective, I nonetheless found myself carefully reading them, captivated by their vivid obscurity (an oxymoron, I know). Here's a passage from "...The Stick": "So to the heart of the hindmost the drunk, reprobate, and the Holy Ghost I offer the itch that never stops never and forever the ass of always-come-along dangling from my knotty tether an angry bellwether of what always goes wrong" And although the vocals tend to dominate this album, these guys can still rock out, as evidenced by the energetic middle section of "Sawmill," where they actually get some extended jamming in, a true rarity on this album. I don't hear what I would describe as impressive musicianship, but somehow, their tattered melodies crawl their way into your brain, slithering about, beguiling your synapses. This is whiskey in an old AM radio, oozing rock-and-roll, and leaking clumps of vocal dementia. Bottom Line: The first half of this record is more interesting than the second. As the album progresses, things get a bit out of hand even for me. In fact, the last track, "Shine (Glimmer)," is literally over thirty minutes of guitar feedback, random drum beats, and cymbal hits; a true test of patience. However, since nine out of ten albums we receive are overly similar, it's refreshing to hear something totally off-the-wall and distinctly original. I couldn't help but enjoy this psychotic album. The PHOENIX, Sonoma, California It will be a big change of gear from Oxbow, a band that sounds the way it feels to turn over a smooth, clean rock in the woods and see all the millipedes, rotting leaves, and maggots underneath. Frontman Eugene Robinson's vocals twist and screech incomprehensibly from yelps to screams to wails against a backwash of twitching guitars and tortured orchestral rumblings. The Palo Alto band has been around for a dozen years or so, and they've built up a sizable European following that they will probably never achieve here in the States--Oxbow's music is just too uncompromising and experimental. An Evil Heat, their latest album, rings with themes of sexual compulsion and religious implications of guilt. Onstage, Robinson's been known to cover his ears with duct tape and strip down. It's all part of Oxbow's highly confrontational live show, which, though it can't replicate all the intricacies--string sections, saxophones, and jazz, blues, and classical samples--of their recorded albums, still makes up for it with an incomparable element of insane intensity. http://www.metroactive.com/papers/sonoma/11.07.02/phoenix-0245.html CONDITION i searched out eugene from oxbow and met the rest of the band and kicked them down some cds and let them get back to the business they were working out when interrupted. after a while i sat down for what was to be the spectacle that is oxbow. and yes it was a spectacle, to normal people not in a good way but since im not normal people it was great. they burned through what seemed to be only a 20 minute set but for all i know it could of been an hour and i was that entertained that it only seemed like 20 minutes. eugene (the singer) progressively lost his clothes throughout the entire set but i was kind of disappointed that i didnt get to see any cock, but more so disappointed that hammy didnt get cock in her face. their bass player (whose name eludes me right now because i was kind of in a drunken stupor when i officially met them) was bad ass, anyone who plays fretless is ok by me. and anyone who plays full chords on a fretless is even more ok. for those who dont know oxbow is comprised of really good musicians who can skillfully craft and perform all out mayhem. it sucks these guys dont get the kind of respect they deserve. but if they got any kind of respect they couldnt possibly be as good as they are. shortly after that we had to leave since ross has work in the morning. but the night had been everything id hoped for. nothing less than wonderful. soon oxbow will play sacto with condition. ear drums will hurt, people will be offended, and with any luck a riot will happen when you guys come to sacto. http://www.livejournal.com/users/i04nkt23 NEXT ISSUE: EUGENE OFFERS TO FIGHT ANYBODY SUING OXBOW... ALL AT ONE TIME... WITH SURPRISING RESULTS. [ Newsletter ]